Planning a dinner date with husband and a toddler

The life of a parent changes a lot after pregnancy and childbirth. During pregnancy, while women enjoy the attention they get from the family and pampered well, the sacrifices of parents start from there. We women, take care of ourselves a lot during pregnancy, eat healthy food, try to be stress-free and happy. But, we avoid junk food and reduce outside food. Sometimes, even our hormones and mood doesn't help in dining at a restaurant with our beloved. After childbirth, the scenario is entirely different. Until the baby reaches 6 months of age, breastfeeding moms have a lot of food restrictions and they have to be available all around the clock to tend to the baby and take rest whenever possible. After 6 months, it is a tough time for moms, going back to the office(if, working), managing stress, introducing solid foods to toddlers and handling their tantrums. But, this is the right time for the couple to think about 'couple time'/ private time once again and plan dinner dates.

Picture Courtesy: Google image marked for non-commercial reuse

We too tried going on a dinner date with the little one by the side when he was 1 year old. But, it was not that great experience with kid banging on the table with plates and forks, making a mess on the table and sometimes even climbing on the table and crawling to the food. The experience was not pleasant and we could feel the harsh looks from other diners too.  As a parent, we learn from previous mistakes, experiment new methods, follow tips, understand kids better and grow up with them. These are some tips which helped us to keep our cool while dining with the toddler.

1. Selection of the restaurant

The selection of a right restaurant makes a hell lot of difference. If children love the place, they are less cranky and more observant. There are many themed restaurants these days in India like a rain forest environment with fountains and animals or a cave themed one or one with a beach environment or a restaurant with model trains or flights.  In US, anyways, a few restaurants have play areas inside so that children won't get bored. We choose a restaurant which is kid friendly. Kids might be interested in eating quick and playing, while we can keep an eye on them and have a cool talk. 

2. Choosing a right time

It's important that we choose a time to visit the restaurant when the toddler is not cranky. When kids are too hungry or too sleepy,  they start tantrums in any new place. I feed something to my toddler before we leave to the restaurant - at least a fruit or a cookie so that he won't be very hungry and also not full. We choose a time at least half an hour before his usual dinner/ lunch time. We always avoid the times when he usually sleeps.

3. Selecting a kid friendly starter

We always see to it that there is a kid friendly starter before main meal is served so that my toddler can munch and be comfortable in the restaurant. Carrot sticks in a dip or cucumber sticks or papad or nuggets or french fries are good to bring cheerful mood and reduce crankiness.

Picture courtesy: www.pixabay.com

4. Keeping cutlery away and choosing a proper seat

I think every parent agrees with me that fragile plates, glasses, spoons and forks should be kept away from toddlers. They play with these forks and glasses and there is a high possibility of breaking them or banging them on the table. If a restaurant provides high chairs specific for toddlers, it's great. Else, it is better to prefer a sofa seat and put them near the wall so that they cannot run the restaurant at their will. I prefer making my toddler sit near the side of the table so that it is easy to feed to him while we eat and it is also easy to keep all cutlery away. 

5. Backup plan if nothing else works

Whatever care we take, toddlers are unpredictable. I keep a backup plan like walking him around if he gets bored, showing some pictures on my phone or asking him to pose for a photo or asking him to identify vegetables and colors in the restaurant designs. Some restaurants in the US also provide crayons and coloring sheets which are a relief. We anyways know that we can show rhymes on youtube with low volume at worst case.

I wish you have a good dinner date with your spouse and toddler with peace following above tips. Please do let me know if any of these tips really help you. Also, I would love to know other tips and recommendations. 

Until next time,

My Top 5 Parenting tips

Every child is unique and so is a parent, what do you say?

So, I don't believe parenting tips work the same for everyone.

As a parent, we learn from experiences, try our best to give happiness to our kids. We make mistakes, realize later, and correct them. The tips that I am sharing now are some tried and tested ones. I will be glad if you can relate to those and they help you too..

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1. Managing Tantrums

This is a big deal really, especially if you have an infant/toddler. Children are sometimes stubborn. Since they cannot still talk at that age, they try to grab the attention of parents either by crying loud or doing something else which is irritating to the parents. 

So, we can't blame them as it's their way of expressing anger/ disagreement.

In these cases, I will be stubborn too, but just that I won't shout at them. 

Patience is the key to manage tantrums and we have to repeat the same instructions many times and let them understand. Sometimes, I  feel, I am too strong and dominant in these cases, but when it comes to their health or safety, let me be a bad mother for some time.


2. Managing a fussy eater

I always have good patience, but when it comes to feeding my 1-year-old, I give up. I know, I shouldn't force feed, but every mom is concerned about her child's health, right?

Gradually, I started practicing a few tips which solved this problem for me. 

• Maintaining proper meal times
• Giving them proper exercise before lunch/dinner like running or playing
• Adding more fruits to increase their appetite
• Making it a family meal together
• Allowing to eat by themselves and bearing with the mess 
• Maintaining a proper gap between foods etc.,

There are soo many that I would save it for another post later :-)

3. Trying not to be  a 100% perfect mom

We always try to be perfect - feeding kids the perfect quantity of meals with perfect nutrition, grooming them, getting the toys that they love, spending more time with them, etc., But is it possible? I miss many of these. 

Sometimes, I am lazy to cook a very nutritious meal, get tired to feed them for some more time, get tired to be a good parent not shouting at them. I talk to my friends, browse the web, do my errands and sometimes, I cannot give complete attention to them and play with them. But, I feel, this is Ok. I will try my best what I can provide to my kid and sometimes, I falter and this is Ok.

Striving to be perfect is good, but if it increases your stress level, it's not worth it. I would love to hear your thoughts on this, please share your opinion in comments.

4. Engaging the kid

This is the biggest task. We need more patience and creativity. I use google to search for better ideas to engage them. Anyways, Pinterest helps me to find an easy craft any time a day.

To engage my 1-year-old, I usually stack building blocks with him, encourage him to play with the ball, run more, watch and hum rhymes, and read storybooks. Other than allowing him to play with toys and do painting, I encourage and help my 5-year-old to make crafts.

 We all like storytelling. I get Disney comic books and read out to them by showing pictures. Traveling to new places and playing outside are the best pass-times that they love. There are many ways to engage kids and I am yet to explore more.

5. Allowing some 'Me' time

You might say, this is not a parenting tip. But, A happy parent can raise a happy child. Agree?

If we all are mechanically doing the chores and dedicating our complete time to kids alone, we might lose that spark within us slowly.

I like reading, blogging, software testing, dancing, and a lot more. These are also part of my life. Being myself and doing what I like is the most relaxing. I get at most 2 hours for this as of now, but I am good to sacrifice a little sleep and enjoy my 'Me' time :-)

Wow! I think I have written a lengthy post. 'Parenting' is not a simple task, anyways :-)

Thanks to Corinne and Sanch for giving this wonderful topic for #FridayReflections - Top parenting tips

Until next time,

PS: All images are from google labeled with non-commercial reuse.